Why?
by Nightmare Senshi
Summary: Everyone always asked her 'why', she'd smile sadly and get lost in thought. Lucy/OC. Mature story.


Author's Note: I wrote this with a lot of consultation with Desna, not only because I was using her characters, but because I wanted a decent ending and representation of Archangel Magic, which she wrote. She owns the Pradesh boys, White Sea, Rowan, etc. I own Hestor Kedanza...and the twisted story. Fairy Tail belongs to Mashima.

This is a Mature Story, which has a few mature themes. you've been warned. This piece has talk of Depression, Anxiety and attempted suicide.

Now, a lot of people have asked "Why don't you pair Lucy and Hestor?". There are a few reasons: one he is Androsexual, meaning he prefers the male body to the female. he is boscan, so he has slept with women, but he found his preferences lay in Pecs not "boobs of death" as he often calls them. He suffers from depression and Anxiety, something that I truly do not believe Lucy would be able to ever fully help him overcome/deal with because she has her own depression and her own anxiety. if you have questions, feel free to DM me and I will explain what I can. I've been working on the development of hestor for over six months now while working side by side with Desna to not only give him life, but give him Depth.

This is the closest any one will most likely ever see as him in a full on relationship with Lucy.

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When people asked what she had seen in her significant other, Lucy would just give a secretive little smile. They'd met in her time at the Academe, a feat in and of itself, but she had been over the moon to go.

It took two years to really get to know him and she'd changed her opinion of him. It had been during a shared class, Star Reading, they had quite a few together, and most of them they were not at all nice to one another, but...she'd seen the person behind that mask he wore. She saw the person behind the snarky, detached asshole.

They'd had to get together over spring break for a project and it was hot as hell out, yet there he was, wearing dark, heavy clothes and while she normally did respect personal boundaries, she couldn't take seeing him in those heavy clothes. The fight that had ensued had been loud and violent against his shirt, but when they both stared at one another, him with narrowed eyes and her with confusion, she'd just run her fingers along the marks on the inside of his wrists.

He'd tried to get out of the conversation more than a few times and she'd pestered him, concerned. Which had lead to another argument and him walking to a cabinet and pulling out a couple of pill bottles. He'd glared at her, taken one out of each, then put the bottles back before stalking to his kitchen, telling her to get out. She'd waited until he was running water and checked the bottles before huffing, yelling that she could do the project without him, and storming out.

After she'd finished half the project, she'd looked into the medicines and had pieced a bit together. The man dealt with depression and anxiety...and the scars on his wrists let her know that he'd more than once tried to end his life. She wasn't sure how to deal with it, but she had to figure it out. The scars alone would have set off more than enough bells.

She was less forceful in getting to know him after that and he'd been wary, like an animal that had been kicked one too many times. Yet, when the two of them worked on their magic, despite his feeling so dark and her's feeling so light, it melded well, swirled in power and the rush had been amazing...and bound them together...so they'd worked on...them, as a couple, as much as they could.

Oh, how her team hated him when they first met him...of course it had been them walking into her apartment and them destroying it and she'd screamed, yelled and the moment that they'd brushed it off, he'd brought out his spirits and they were...removed none too gently. The man hissing and spitting at the window and then slamming it. He'd then helped her clean up without any word of protest.

He'd even called his Guild in Bosco, ranting, raving and the man on the other end had listened calmly and Lucy swore his tone was one of someone rolling their eyes at dramatics. Then he'd asked about the man's health, and Lucy knew the real reason he was asking: those bottles of pills. She'd heard a concern in the guildmaster's tone that had made her wary and almost snippish. She'd say jealousy, but Hestor had shown an unwavering loyalty to her and Heaven's knew he could probably have left her after all the arguments they had.

He'd still gone between Bosco and Magnolia, but when he'd bought her a house and had Freed rune it to 'hell, heaven and the four corners of the universe' - his words, not hers - she'd felt more at ease. She'd tried to protest it being bought and he'd arched a light brow at her and said that if she felt that bad about it, she could pay him back...that and he liked to stand on the porch with a cup of coffee in the morning and smirk at Natsu, she swore it was up there on his lists of Favorite hobbies. Natsu, out of all the members of Fairy Tail, had hated Hestor the most. The man almost made it a point to stand there, drink his coffee and wave at the furious Dragon Slayer just to see him rage until the rune alarms had Laxus coming and dragging him away.

She met a lot of people from his Guild, even gone with him and she'd been pulled out of bad situations. He had deep connections with the Academe and she'd been drug off in the middle of the night after hearing his com go off and him having a hissed conversation many a times. She never did understand, but...the few Celestial Mages that were left always seemed to dwindle, year by year. There were five of them now, the two of them, Sorano, a man in Iceberg and a woman in Joya...well for then.

What started out as friendship, lead to a very odd four way..something she was not quite sure about. She'd been drawn to Zen while her other half had been talking to the guildmaster and both had groaned at the resulting mating that she and the archangel had gone through. He'd first hissed and spit at her, which was his normal go to, then sighed as she'd started crying and clung to him. That's when she learned that while their magics had bonded during a unison raid, they still had quite a few feelings for others...and archangel magic was very dangerous to both parties involved. He also loved her no less for the actions, but they did talk long and hard over things.

She had to admit that the four of them were interesting...and many thought - wrongly so - that she was sleeping with all of them. She had nothing against the guildmaster, but...she was apprehensive about someone that could hear her every thought, even though Hestor assured her that he didn't just do it. She was just...glad he'd accepted her back after the screwed up thing she'd done with Zen. Zen took it semi in stride, all four realizing it was just the magic at work and nothing they could do about it. She had tried to explain that they were really more like three couples living together...three couples of four people and while Boscans accepted it, Fiorians did not. They found it odd and her former guild had said so very often.

She found despite the mating, she was jealous of him and the guildmaster, which was odd, but, he'd also opened her eyes up and...gotten her help so she wouldn't end up like him. Every so often, she'd get jealous of him spending time with the guildmaster and the fights in the evenings were spectacular, at least on her part. He let her rage and took it quietly, then held her after before getting her into bed. She'd admit she always felt bad, but there was always coffee and breakfast waiting.

Of course, after another bottle of pills had shown up, she'd realized something was up. She couldn't directly ask him, but she did fight with him about her seeing one of the mental health specialists. It had been a fight, her refusing that she needed help, him pointing out that she obviously did...and she was sure splitting her time between the two guilds was trying for him.

It showed, after a few years, anyway. She'd felt the bond he insisted that she make with the Guildmaster after that whole mating fiasco between him and mindbender after she'd literally thrown one of her jealous fits about him spending time with the man; she'd known it was wrong, but the result had been a second archangel born and Hestor demanding that she bond with Kaleb for safety. She didn't quite understand the why, but Kaleb had explained that the missions Hestor went on were dangerous and what they'd figured, after calmly talking, was that it was to protect both of them. She truly didn't understand why he hid all of these calmer, nicer emotions away from the world, but she was always glad that she got to see them, if only for a scant seven years of their lives.

When his favorite coffee mug had suddenly cracked down the middle, it had caused her pause in the middle of tending to their daughter who looked almost exactly like her, but had his steely eyes. It wouldn't be until late that night that she had gotten the news and she just..felt the world drop out from under her as Zen held her and told her. She figured Kaleb knew earlier, but the mindbender had locked himself in his room in their home and not said anything, but she could feel an ache along the bond they shared and it had worried her.

In their years together, he'd trained her, honed her skills, given her a strange little family unit...and then left, all to save someone else. To save her idiot dragon slayer ex-best friend and ex-partner of all people. The question their five year old daughter had asked was what had killed her inside.

"Where's Papa?"

Strangely enough, it had been Kaleb that had given the girl some sort of answer, "he has been taken to study a new magic. We don't know when he's going to be coming back. Angelic magics are tricky to study and he has to go live with Angels for a long time."

The girl had stared at the guildmaster for a few long moments and then huffed in a manner very much like her father, "baka."

Lucy had been grateful, if she was honest, she didn't want to have to explain to the girl that her father was dead. She had cut Fairy Tail almost completely out of her life at that point, not that they were in her life much anyway by that time and the pretty little house was where they went when the brothers wanted to visit Bickslow. She found it hard every time, seeing the little things that he'd left her, magical trinkets that reminded her that there was more than light to their magic.


End file.
